She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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