He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize