D3 body, D1 cock
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
