im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize