already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
