I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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