Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
She told me I should be a condom model.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
