At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
