He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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