So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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