Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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