i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
is wine microwaveable?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
