just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Randomize
