Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
