its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I got inside last night via doggy door
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
