how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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