I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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