come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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