Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize