He managed to light the Jello on fire...
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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