Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
