Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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