the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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