I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
