With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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