I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize
