I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize