I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize