Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
