There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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