She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I'm way too hungover for life right now
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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