she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
