You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
