I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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