So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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