I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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