I heard we made out
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
