is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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