he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Four minutes until I can fart!
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
