hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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