Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
