i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
