you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Actions speak louder than pants.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize