I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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