We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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