I cockslap morals
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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