the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
