She announced her abortion via fbk
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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