How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
