i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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