She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
