Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
